Redefining Nothing
by Siriusluver-le
Summary: Snape gave it all up to be a spy...Hermione's two best friends are dating...but maybe there's something coming that neither of them expect....
1. Strange Feelings

"No, Harry!! Not that one!!" Hermione caught his hand. "You want powered moonlily not powdered nightshade."

Harry quickly corrected his ingredient, and muttered, "Thanks Hermione."

"Be careful next time. You're using a dragon's blood base. Nightshade and dragon's blood are explosive when mixed." Hermione chastised him.

"Very good, Miss Granger." Professor Snape said in his characterisitcally silky voice.

Hermione jumped. She hadn't heard him approach her. She looked up at him. "Thank you, sir." She muttered shyly and then turned back to her potion.

Snape looked at Hermione's back as she turned away from him. His gaze stroked her dark hair. There was no denying that she was attractive. _Where did that thought come from?? You're going mad Severus Snape. She's just your know-it-all Gryffindor student._ In a sudden fit of ill-temper he rounded on Harry. "Twenty points from Gryffindor for not…paying…attention!!!" He snapped.

Harry looked like he was going to say something, but Ron stood on his foot under the table. "It's not worth the detention mate." He said as Snape walked away. "Besides did you see how he was looking at Hermione??" He snickered.

"What do you mean??" Hermione asked from Harry's other side.

"I mean, that he was undressing you with his eyes. That's what." Ron said, chuckling again, but managing to look disgusted at the same time.

"Ron, this is Snape!! Sanpe doesn't "undress" students." Hermione gasped. She found herself wondering if Snape at ever undressed anyone.

"I'm just telling you what I saw!!" Ron protested in self defense.

"Harry back me up!!" Hermione begged.

"I don't know…he was certainly giving you some strange looks."

"HARRY!!!" Hermione was so shocked that she over tipped her bottle over her cauldron. Instead of just two drops of lavender water she tipped half a bottle in. A loud bang like a gunshot echoed through the dungeon. Up near the front of the room Snape jumped as though something had bitten him. Turning like a gigantic bat in flight he strormed towards them.

"What happened??" He asked icily.

"Sorry Professor!! I accidentally scared Hermione and she over did the lavender water. That's what caused the bang."

"Detention, Mr. Potter, for horseplay. Miss Granger?" He looked at Hermione who was staring in shock at her smoking cauldron. "Are you alright, Miss Granger?"

"Y-y-yes, Professor." Hermione stammered out in a whisper.

Just then the bell rang for class to end. "My office, 8pm sharp Mr. Potter." Snape said as he whirled away."I want 18 inches on sleeping droughts on my desk by Monday." He announced to the room at large. "Class dismissed."

In the general clamor of students hurrying to leave his room, Snape watched Hermione prepare to leace. She scourged her cauldron, shrank it, and stuffed it into her bag. He found himself admiring her for the zillionth time htat day. As usual his mood blackened when he caught his train of thought. So black was his temper that the first years who made up his next class were constantly cringing all period.

As Harry lef the dungeons with Ron and Hermione even Snape's detention couldn't bring him down. "Ron's right, Hermione!" He exclaimed as they climbed the marble staircase. "I think Snape fancies you!"

"You two are so ridiculous!" There is no way in hell." Hermione assured them, but despite her best efforts her face reddened. "I'll see you both at lunch." She turned down a side corridor that led to Professor Vector's Arithmancy classroom.

"Bloody hell," Ron muttered as he and Harry joined the throng heading for Divination. "I think _she_ fancies _him_!!"

"Hermione does not fancy the Greasy Git, Ron!" Harry assured his frined. But Ron wasn't convinced, not by a long shot.

Snape found that for the rest of the morning Hermione was never far from his thoughts. He found himself dwelling on her silky hair and her brilliant smiles. When a particularly iept first year made a mistake he compared them to her brilliance. But Severus Snape needed no one. He'd become the Order's most valuable spy and he hadn't needed help. He needed nothing. _ No, _his mind told him. _You __**have **__nothing so you've convinced yourself that you __**need**__ nothing.You needed __**her. **_

It was trued. The young Severus Snpe had needed Lily Evans, but James Potter had gotten her. He'd closed his heart that day. _But you don't really enjoy the solitude,_ that conscience like voice whispered at him again. _Someone with life and spark would do you good._

"The world has nothing to tempt me with anymore!!" He raged at his empty study. A few of the jars rattled ominously from his voice. But even as he shouted it to the emtory room, he realized that his heart had ceased to believe it.

Lunch at the staff table promised to be a tense affair. Snape was still in a black temper that would make the teachers near him uncomfortable. He though that maybe by being extrea nasty these strange new feelings of his would go away.

The teachers reacted very differently. McGonagall, Sprout, and most of the others avoided him. Unusual, they usually at least tried to talk to him. Dumbledore on the other hand reacted completely predictably. He smiled and siad warmly, "Good afternoon, Severus."

"Good afternoon, Headmaster." Severus said stiffly. Dumbledore took his seat still smiling.

Only two other teachers made a point of adressin gthe Potions Master. Remus Lupin, Professor of Defense Against the Dark Arts, gave him a polite hello. Remus' co-professor however was not as pleasant. Noting the dark look on his colleague's brow, Sirius Black smiled. "Did some student let off a dung bomb in the dungeons, Severus?"

"No." Severus said darkly. He wouldn't give Sirius the pleasure of him asking why.

As it turned out he didn't need to. "You look HORRIBLE!! Did you wake up with you slacks in a bunch??"

"Sirius…" Remus cautioned in a warning tone from off to one side.

"What did you say, dog??" Severus hissed at Sirius, ignoring Remus completely.

"I said…you….look….horrible." Sirius said bluntly.

Severus reached simultaneously fro his wand and Sirius' mind. His mental probe was greeted by a block as solid as stone. He growled. Sirius had learned Occlumency had he, well that just put a new twist on the game. In the time it took to think this a barrage of jinxes and curses hit him. He flew backwards. Scrambling to his feet he went immediately on offense, but before he could launch even one curse Dumbledore stepped in.

"Thank yo ufor that wonderful dueling demonstration. Now I think our students should be allowed to eat something. Feel free to use classtime to further their knowledge of dueling, though." At his words hundreds of eyes shifted back to Severus and Sirius.

"You never know when dueling might come in handy." Sirius offered with a bow to the audience. This was greeted by thunderous applause from the Gryffindor table.

Hermione fidgeted between Harry and Ron. Both boys were giving Sirius an enthusiastic round of applause. Hermione found that she just couldn't bring herself to join them. Accutely awar when Snape entered the Great Hall, she'd seen the whole interaction. Sirius had adressed Snape and then attacked him. She like Harry's godfather, but she flet bad for Snape. Her heart twisted for him and she barely stopped herself from jumping up when Sirius' curses sent him flying.

"Did you see that, 'Mione!!" Ron gushed as the scene at the head table abated. "Sir…I mean, Professor Black totally pulled one over on the Greasy Git."

"He attacked him you mean." Hermione protested.

"Pfsh, no." Ron said looking disgusted. "He just one upped him."

"Sirius provoked him and attacked him!!" She protested.

"Are you backing Snape up?!" Harry asked incredulously. "Snape probably bated Sirius into it."

"Sirius spoke to him first. I was watching!" Hermion blurted.

Ron's eyebrows flicked up . "Do you fancy him?" He asked, his earlier suspicions bubbling to the surface.

"Oh don't be ridiculous, Ronald!" Hermione snapped. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go to the library." She rose and left the hall. But she didn't go to the library. She couldn't. Ron had struck a cord. Did she fancy Professor Snape? _No! _She thought firmly. _There is nothing there. Nothing!!_

The afternoon passed quickly away and the weekend set in. It was a somewhat dreary October day so Harry, Ron, and Hermione spent Saturday holed up in the Gryffindor common room. Hermione insisted on them spending at least an hour on Snape's essay. Then they boyts delved into a game of Wizards Chess. Hermione, who still found the game barbaric all these years later, continued to work on her essay.

Sunday a storm broke loose over the castle and further restricted the students time. By noon Hermione retired to the library to aviod the racously loud Wizard Chess tournament in the common room.

Snape spent the dreary weekend in his dungeon office. He tried to work some in his lab, but the second time he added the wrong ingredient he gave up. He was just too distracted and it was all her fault. If she hadn't done….whatever she'd done to him then he would be in this snit. But that wasn't fair. She probably never dreamed of affecting him the way she did. _Well, more like a ngihtmare really_. He though as he caught his reflection in the mirror.

Monday morning dawned with the crispness that comes after the rain. It was clear and dry, but still cold enough to merit scarves outside. At midmorning Harry, Ron, and Hermione joined the throng of Gryffindor's and Slytherins trooping into the dungeons. Once inside they took their seats in the back quietly.

"I'll collect you essays with your potions at the end of class. Your insturctions…" Snape tapped the chalkboard with his wand and words began to appear, "are there. Get to work." Immediately the bustle began.

Not long into the period Ron began frowning. "This doesn't seem right." He said, furrowing his brow. "Hermione will ou look at this for me?"

Sighing, Hermione walked around the table. She looked into the cauldron. Instead of the crystal clear Veritaserum they were supposed to be brewing, a thick brownish sludge filled Ron's cauldron. "What have you done?" She asked.

"I don't know." Ron shrugged. "Something wrong I guess."

"No kidding." Hermione muttered. She added an ingredient that she hoped would clear it up, but instead a geyser of superheated steam blillowed up. It scalded her face and hands as she bent to stir. Being magical steam its burns developed in the form of raw and bleeding gashes. She screamed involuntarily as the pain hit her.

Snape's head snapped up at the sound of her scream. He only vaguely saw the blood coating her arms, hands, and face before he snapped into action. "Potter!" he yelled, "Get her to the hospital wing, immediately!!" To the boy's credit, Potter jumped right up and did what he was told instantly. In a moment they were under way. Then Snape rounded on Ron. "What happened, Weasley?"

Ron flinched away from Snape's wrath. "My potion didn't look right and I asked Hermione to check it for me. She added an ingredient that she said would clear it up. She bent to stir it and the steam bubbled up. It burned her, but the burns….Well, you saw them, sir." He finished lamely.

"Yes, Weasley, my eyes work just fine thank you." Snape snapped. He thought a minute and then he looked into Ron's caludron carefully. "I'm obliged to give you a measure of credit, Weasley. Never in all my years as a teacher has a student ever screwed up Veritaserum this badly." He smirked. "This is Saberon. It's a torture potion. Miss Greanger is lucky she mearly encountered the steam."

"What would swallowing it do?" Neville Longbottom asked shyly.

"It's like swallowing shards of a knife blade." Snape said evenly. "Now back to work." AS he walked back to his desk he couldn't quiet the palpatations of his heart. He wanted to go check on Hermione, but knew that it would look inappropriate if the Head of Slytherin House went to visit a Gryffindor student. Especially a Gryffindor that he was generally thought to particularly dislike. Over the course of the rest of the day, worry blackened his already black mood.

Madame Pomphrey obliged Hermione to stay the remainder of the day, even though the cuts were healed in an hour. She said that since they were magically induced she wanted to make sure that no infection occurred. Anxious about missing her classes Hermione made Harry promise to take decent notes for her. He promised he would and that he'd even stop by and get her work from Professor Vector. And so Hermione was left alone fro the day in the hospital wing.

She was released that evening around dinner. She gathered her things. As she was leaving her bag crinkled. Without even checking she remembered that she hadn't turned in Snape's essay. Abandoning her designs on Gryffindor Tower, she began to head down to the dungeons. She really didn't want to see Snape, but he was probably at dinner. In that case she'd just slide it under the door of his office.

When she arrived at the door to his office habit made her knock. To her shock a curt voice snapped, "Come in and be quick about it!!" Hurriedly she opened the door and stepped inside.

The Potions Master's office was perpetually filled by a strange, eery glow. It eminated from the shelves of potion ingredients floating in liquids of varying colors. Snape sat behind the large black wood desk grading papers. He looked up into the one set of eyes he'd been most secretly longing to see. "Miss Granger." He acknowledged trying to disguise his racing pulse. "They released you from the hospital wing already?"

"Yes, sir." Hermione said. Her voice sounded small and breathless even to her own ears. _Stop it!! _ She chastised herself. _He's just your teacher. _

"Perhaps they should have kept you longer for observation." Snape said sounding uncharacteristically concerned.

"If Madame Pomphrey had tried to keep me one more minute I'd have hexed her." Hermione protested. To her surprise Snape laughed.

"I can only imagine Madame Pomphrey's anguish in trying to keep you in bed at all, even if only for one afternoon." He said, still smiling.

To her increasing surprise, Hermione found herself returning his smile. She felt completely at ease.

"Now, Miss Granger, what did you come all the way down here to see me about?" He asked.

"I didn't get a chance to turn in my essay, Sir." Hermione said, pulling it out of her bag. She stepped forward and handed it to him. "I also wanted to ask if there was a way to make up the work I missed in class today."

Snape was silent for a moment. Being just the two of them in his small office was more than he cold ask for, but it was also dangerous. She awoke foreign emotions in him that he was still learning to control. None the less, he spoke his first thought. "I need a lab assistant for some work I have to do this Saturday. If you'd consent to help me I'll give you full marks on your Veritaserum." He offered.

He was rewarded when Hermione's face lit up. "I'd love to, Professor. Thank you." She exclaimed.

"You're welcome, Miss Granger. I'll expect you here at 8 o'clock in the morning. Please be prompt."

"Absolutely. I'll be here on time." Hermione promised.

"Very good. Now, its getting late and you still need your rest." Snape siad. Hermione nodded and turned to go. "Oh, and Miss Granger… I'm glad your not seriously incapacitated."

"Thank you sir." And with that she disappeared out the door.

After she'd gone Snape sighed to the empty room. "You're asking for trouble Severus." He said outloud. "You should not be spending time alone with her." But it was set and ninety percent of his being wanted it more than almost anything else.


	2. Experiments

Redefining Nothing

Ch. 2: Experiments

A/N: Thanks to all for the wonderful reviews on the first chapter. I'm actually quite happy with the way that this one is turning out and hopefully I'll be able to keep it going.

"You're WHAT?!?!?!" Ron gasped choking on his pumpkin juice.

Hermione sighed. "I'm helping Professor Snape with one of his experiments."

"Why?" Harry asked sounding shocked and disgusted all at once.

"To make up the credits I missed while I was in the hospital wing." She explained pateintly. "Now, I'm going to be late, so exuse me."

Because of the boys' demands for explainations she practically had to run to the dungeons. When she arrived at the door she entered the classroom and knocked on the door that led to his office.

"Come in!" The voice sounded muffled.

Hermione entered the room. To her surprise it was empty. A door she hadn't even known existed was open on a dark hallway.

"Through here." A voice called from the blackened hallway. Hermione hurried after it. At the other end of the surprisingly short hall was a thinck door. Taking a deep breath Hermione opened the door and stepped inside. If she'd thought his office was odd, well it ahd nothing on his dimly lit lab. A multitude of jars stood on dozens of shelves glinting in the dim blue-grey light that seemed to have no source. Several cauldrons sat maong neat piles of ingredients on two large work tables. Snape hovered alongside one table.

"Good morning, Miss Granger." He said casually, and surprisingly politely, as she entered the room.

"Good morning, Professor Snape. I'm sorry I'm late I-…."

"Don't apologize, Hermione. I slept in anyway. I wouldn't have been ready for you if you'd arrived five minutes ago."

Hermione couldn't decide what shocked her more: that Snape wasn't angry with her for being late of that he'd used her first name. "Thank you for letting me come, Professor."

"You're welcome." He smiled slightly. "Oh, and Hermione…." She looked up at him curiously. "I don't like to be called Professor on the weekends. Severus will do for today."

Hermione was so startled she was speechless. It felt like a cloud of butterflies had moved into her stomach. Somehow she kenw that a line was being crossed today, she just asn't sure what it was. "Well, what are we doing today, Severus?" She asked cautiously.

His smile widened. "Shall we begin and find out?"

She nodded contentedly and they go to work. To the surprise of both parties they found that they worked in great unison. They had similar work ethics and ways of thinking. They didn't talk much, but the silence was by no means uncomfortable. It was a very complex potion, but to Severus' pleasure Hermione seemed to understand it perfectly.

"I need three-fourths a cup of diced beats." Severus said. Out of the corner of his eye he saw her reach for the potion's instructions. Her brow furrowed slightly. "But, Severus," she said mildly, "if we add only a quarter cup of beets and half a cup of quartered pin root wouldn't it enhance the droziness properties."

He pulled the recipe towards him. He looked at it and pondered for a moment. "I think you might actually be right." He said, trying not to show his surprise at never having thought of that before. "We shall try it."

Hermione smiled and they worked a while longer in silence. "What exactly are we making?" She pressed finally.

"Professor Lupin's draught." Severus said.

"Oh." Hermione said quietly. "I'm glad I could help." She added.

"Your extra droziness agent will most certainly make him more comfortable." Severus said trying keep the conversation flowing. In the silence his heart was beginning to pound uncomfortably again.

"I do hope so." She sounded worried. "I'd hate for him to suffer."

"He won't." Severus promised. "That's why we're doing this. You're helping, Hermione, I promise."

At about noon they finally completed the draught and set it to simmer for the alotted time. Severus observed the time and withheld a sigh. He really didn't want her to leave yet. "Well," he began slowly, "you have two options. One, you can go eat with your friends. You've more than made up your credits. Or you can eat here with me and help me with my own research after lunch." He held his breath wating, hoping, for the answer he wanted.

Hermione didn't even have to think about it. She really didn't want to face the boy's just yet. Besides she enjoyed the mental exercise and she was having a shocking amount of fun. "I'll stay. I'd love to help you with research."

Severus smiled. It was almost blinding when he really truly smiled. Secretly Hermione wondered why he didn't do it more often. "Shall we see about getting some food." He offered.

Hermione nodded. She didn't trust herself to speak coherently. She followed as he led her out of the lab and back down the short hallway. But before they reached his office he turned through another door that she hadn't seen before. Her guided her down a short flight of steps and through an archway. Suddenly they were in and spacious and well lit, if plain kitchen.

"Welcom to my home." He said simply.

"I didn't even know all this was down here." Hermione said as she gazed around in wonder.

"That's to be expected. Most teachers don't know it's here. I don't expect that any students do. Besides the obvious exception of yourself." He smiled again.

As Severus tried to contact the kitchen house elves to get lunch sent to them, Hermione purused his personal library. She gazed at the titles in wonder. Many of the theories they presented were foreign to her. She vaguely heard Severus arguing behind her. He had flooed his head into the kitchens. From the muffled things she could hear he was arguing with a house elf about the cauldron over his head. Chuckling, she selected a book titled 'Apparation Draughts'. She sat dwon on the sofa in the sitting room attached to the kitchen and began to read.

"Did you find something you'd like to borrow?" Severus asked silkily.

Hermione jumped. She hadn't heard him approach. She napped the book closed. "Oh, um, no…Just killing time."

"Lunch is here."

"Great." Hermione said enthusiastically. "I'm starved!" She stood up from the sofa. To her alarm Severus didn't step back out of her personal space. Rather, when she stood he was much too close. _Just breathe._ She told herself sharply. _He'll move. Don't act stupid. There are no feelings for you there._

Severus could feel her tension as she stood ther between him and the couch. _Be careful which lines you cross Severus Snape. She most likely has not feelings for you._ But he couldn't help himself; with her this close, some line had to be crossed. He raised his hand to stroke her cheek.

Hermione couldn't believe it when Severus' hand me her cheek. It was smooth, warm, and gentle. He rubbed lightly and she looked up to meet his eyes. She needed to see what he was feeling. What she found was not at what she'd expected. His obsidian blakc eyes were filled with adoration. She almost choked. She couldn't believe that this was her frightening Potions Master. Her heart was pounding as she leaned into his hand.

Severus' hand slid to her neck. Her skin was unbelievably warm and soft. Part of his brain screamed a warning that his was wrong. That this was his student. But another part, the dominant part, argued that she apparently wasn't objecting. Tenderly he kissed her.

Hermione couldn't believe that he was actually going to kiss her. When he did she melted. She wasn't sure how long it lasted, but it wasn't long enough.

After a minute of shear bliss, Severus pulled away from her. "I'm sorry Hermione." He said breathlessly. "That was inappropriate of me."

"Don't be sorry." Hermione said almost in a pleading tone. She raised her hand to his hair. "Please."

"We shouldn't…." Severus started as his conscience made an attempt at winning out.

His words registered in Hermione's brain. It suddenly struck her that she had just kissed one of her Professors in his chambers and now she was in his arms. "You're right. This is so wrong." She started, to move away from him.

"Our lunch is still waiting for us." Severus offered blankly.

"I'd probably better go." Hermione said offering him a somewhat sad smile. "Thank you Severus. I quite enjoyed assisting you."

"You're most welcome, Hermione" He said cordially. He watched as she moved completely away from him and out of the door. When he heard the snap of his outer office door he sank onto the couch. It was still warm from when she'd sat there.

Hermione power walked to her dorm room. It was as though a surrealistic fog had settled on her brain. She'd really kissed Professor Snape and more importantly she'd really enjoyed it. It was not something she would have wanted to dream of a week ago. But ever since Ron had noticed the way he looked at her she'd found feeling for him. Now to her great astonishment she found that she did fancy him.

She was still wondering happily at his as she ducked through the portrait hole. Almost immediately Ron and Harry assaulted her.

"We wondered it you were coming back at all." Harry said, sounding relieved. "Was it terrible?"

Hermione just looked at him for a moment. Then she spoke. "No, it wasn't terrible. I actually learned loads." She said brightly.

"Learned?" Ron asked incredulously. "Are we talking about the same Professor Snape?"

"Yes." Hermione sighed. "We worked on Professor Lupin's potion. I found a way to improve it for him." She said proudly.

"I don't believe this!" Ron exclaimed. "You enjoyed working with the Greasy Git!!" His tone was accusitory.

Hermione's temper flared. "Yes, Ronald, I enjoyed it! Is that so terrible!? Did you ever stop to think that maybe Professor Snape is a half decent man?!"

"Pssh, No!!" Ron scoffed.

Uncomfortable, Harry tried to change the topic to stop Hermione's response. "There's a Hogsmeade trip next Satudray." He offered happily. He was secretly looking forward to the time with Ginny. He banked on Ron wanting the time with Lavendar to provied a distraction.

"Oh, great!" Hermione threw up her hands. "How exciting!" Her tone dripped with sarcasm. With that she turned and jogged up to the girl's dormitory.


	3. Hogsmeade

**Redefining Nothing**

Ch 3. Hogsmeade

A/N**: Hope you're all still interested and sorry it's taken so long to get new chapters typed up. I have all the way through most of 5 written, so it will keep coming I promise.**

For the next week Hermione and Ron didn't speak. The highlight of Hermione's day was Potions. Even if Snape couldn't, and didn't, openly acknowledge that she'd been there Saturday, she knew it. It was a moral boost for her during the time Harry spent with Ron. It felt much like her first year at Hogwarts. She spent her breaks in the library and ate alone, and through it all she dreaded the Hogsmead trip. Harry and Ron would disappear off to some romantic hideaway and she'd be left alone. Nothing about the trip appealed to her.

Saturday morning came too quickly. Hermione laid in bed extra long debating whether or not to go at all. At last she decided that the fresh air would do her good. She rose and since uniforms weren't necessary she pulled on a pair of jeans. Looking out the window at the semi-cloudy day, she chose a crimson turtleneck sweater. A black cloak and her Gryffindor scarf completed the outfit. She ran a brush through her hair and headed out.

She grabbed a quick breakfast in the nearly empty hall and then joined the throng leaving the castle. She trapsed through the cold air deep in thought. For a while she walked alone, then someone joined her.

"Hello, Hermione." Luna Lovegood cooed in her dreamy, absent voice.

Hermione looked up. "Oh, hello Luna." She said vaguely. She really didn't feel like talking to anyone.

"Is it true that you assisted Professor Snape last weekend?" Luna asked in her usual blunt, but innocent manner.

"Yes," Hermione said, anger tinging her tone. "Ron told you, did he?"

Luna looked shocked. "No, Professor Snape did."

It was Hermione's turn to be shocked. "He did?"

"Oh yes. You see, I wanted to come in to work on an experiment, but he said he couldn't be there. A sixth year was coming in to act as his lab assistant." Luna explained.

"How did you know it was me?" Hermione pressed.

"I asked him." Luna made it sound as though people asked Snape for specific information on his weekend doings everyday.

"And he told you?"

"Yes." Luna shrugged. "He seemed quite happy about it actually. Odd for Professor Snape don't you think?"

"Quite odd." Hermione muttered. Inside she was smiling to think that he'd been happy to have her coming.

"Hmmm." Luna was quiet for a moment. "Did you read last week's 'Quibbler'?"

"Umm, no sorry." Hermione said distractedly. She should have trusted that Luna wouldn't be in it for the gossip.

"Father interviewed a man who has seen a Snarckle. It was quite interesting." She said dreamily.

"Fascinating." Hermione commented as the conversation drifted off to the realm of the imaginary.

Not long after, Luna spotted Neville and drifted off after him. By now they'd reached the main road in Hogsmeade and the crowd was breaking up. Couple's drifted to Madame Pudifoots Tea Shop. Meanwhile the single's gravitated to either the Three Broomsticks or the new Hogsmeade branch of Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. Wanting to be alone, Hermione avoided the main haunts and ducked down a side street. She wandered aimlessly around looking at various lesser known shops. Occasionally she saw a fellow student of another pedestrian but mostly the steets were empty. Eventually, she found a potion maker's shop that looked interesting and not too creepy.

She pulled open the glass door and stepped into the warm interior. As was her nature, she immediately gravitated to the book section. She found that, like in a library, several padded chairs were provided to read in. She browsed the shelves for a few moments. At last she settled for one called _Truth Potions A to Z _and settled into the nearest chair. She wasn't sure how long she'd been reading when the door opened. She didn't bother to look up. Rather she let the book absorb her once more.

"Miss Granger? What are you doing here?"

Snape's silky voice cut into her focus. Her heart immediately began to pound, despite her attempts to quiet it. She paused and then looked up calmly. "Oh, hello, Professor. I'm just doing a little reading. I didn't feel like facing the crowds on the main street." It was probably more explaination that he really cared to have, but she couldn't help over talking around him.

Smiling, his own heart leaping, Snape strode over to her. "And what are you reading?"

Hermione closed the book to show him the title.

"Do they interest you?" He asked.

Hermione smiled. "Yes. They're very complex and I love studying the various ways that the ingredients combine."

"Only a truly brilliant mind would look at that aspect of it and enjoy it." He praised as he came to a halt in front of her.

Hermione swallowed hard and forced herself to be normal. "What are you doing here, Professor?" She asked.

Snape smiled again. "I was informed that some ingredients that I'd ordered had come in. I came here to get them."

As if on cue a thin, blonde witch of middle age came out of a back room. "Welcome to Brewer's Dream!" She exclaimed. The she gve her partons a more thorough look and she recognized Snape. "Oh, Professor Snape! You'be come for your order! Just a moment. I'll fetch it." She bustled off again, leaving Snape and Hermione alone again. They were silent and a few minutes later the blonde witch returned.

"Thank you, Amelia. It's a pleasure doing business here as always." Snape said pleasantly.

Amelia turned to Hermione then. "Can I help you with anything, Miss?"

"Oh, no thank you. I'm just looking." Hermione said.

Amelia nodded and disappeared again. As soon as the office door clicked Snape turned to Hermione. "You left last week before we could have lunch together. Shall we try again?"

Despite wanting to spend time with him, the thought of it being public made Hermione's stomach squirm. "Is that a good idea?"

"I know a place where no one will see us." He said evenly. At least he hoped it would be safe. "It's not far from here."

"Shall we go then?" Hermione asked, feeling brave.

Snape's heart trilled as she took a minute to shelve her book and join him. He held the door for her and when they were ouside he gently took her hand. Her fingers tensed and for a moment he feared that she'd pull away. He glanced at her only to find her watching him. Her eyes showed startled bewilderment, but also a tentative hope. In response he stroked his thumb across her knuckles. Her hand froze and then became like putty as he continued his massage. Before long her fingers laced through his. They walked in silence for a time holding hands. The contact was simple and yet both parties felt charged and fulfilled by it.

"We're here." Snape siad at last. Her led the way into a dingey café. There were nearly twenty booths and several tables, but all were empty.

"How did you find this place?" Hermione asked.

Snape's mouth twisted upwards in a crooked smile. "After visiting Brewer's Dream one day, I just started to wander around. I got hungry and I wandered in here. They have wonderful French onion soup."

A waitress appeared and seated them in a corner booth. She gave them a minute to look over the menu and then took their orders and disappeared.

"You know, Hermione," Snape said, "I own that book you were reading today. You may borrow it if you wish."

Her eyes lit up. "Really, Professor?"

"Yes, really." Snape said, happy to please her. "And I thought I told you I didn't like to be called 'Professor' on the weekends."

Hermione blushed. "Severus." She whispered shyly. A slight smile tugged at the corners of her mouth.

"Hermione." He whispered in response, reaching for her hand again across the table. The tension that filled them as they whispered each other's Christian names and clasped hands lit them both on fire. They sat there holding hands until their soup arrived. While they ate they talked about Potions and the book that Hermione had been reading. Nearly two hours later they paid for their meal and left. It was nearly time for Hermione to join the rest of the students heading back for the castle. They hadn't walked far before Severus pulled her down a side alley.

"What's going on?" Hermione asked as he backed her gently against the wall.

"I want you to know that what I feel for you dangerous. Teachers shouldn't feel for their students what I feel for you. Tell me you feel the same and this risk will be worth it." He suddenly looked not at all like the arrogant, strict Potions Master. He looked vulnerable and anxious.

Hermione was having a hard time breathing properly. "I….I…I shouldn't…But I do….feel the same." She choked out.

A huge, slightly devilish smile split Severus' features. His hands found the back of her neck as his lips met hers. Hermione twined her arms behind his head as she kissed him back. She shivered as one of his hands slipped down her neck to her shoulders and then her back. His firm hand pulled her closer to him. She wound her fingers in his hair. His mouth was unbearably warm as it moved with hers. Severus moaned in happiness as her tongue darted out to taste his lower lip.

At last, when they were both starting to get dizzy, he pulled away. They clung to each other as both fought to regain control of their breathing and bring their pulses back to normal.

When Hermione had recovered she leaned her head against Severus' should and groaned. "We're in serious trouble, aren't we?"

"My dear, you have no idea." He whispered as he stroked her hair. He sighed, in an almost irritated fashion. "Do you know what you make me feel, Hermione? What you do to me?"

Hermione laughed against his shoulder. "If it's anything like the burning feeling you inspire in me, then yes I have a pretty good idea."

"Hmmm…yes, burning is a good description of it. But it's a pleasant sort of fire." Severus kissed her neck tenderly and held her a bit longer. "You're going to miss the walk back to the castle."

"So?" Hermione murmured, snuggling closer to him. "Can't I just stay here?"

"Now my dear, we must keep up our pretense of teacher and student." His voice dropped to a silken whisper. "But I shall fin da reason to give you 'detention' soon enough." He winked at her to emphasize his implided quotes around detention. "Now you'd better go."

Hermion responded by crushing her mouth to his once more. For a moment their mouths slid together in perfect unison, but then Severus was pulling away.

"No," Hermione begged. "Don't."

Severus laughed. He already adored the way his kisses made her slide into a trance-like state where for a moment all she wanted was more. The only problem was that he wanted nothing more than to ignore reality and give her what she wanted. "My dear, your friends are going to ask questions if your mouth is anymore swollen when you turn up again." Hermione selfconsciously felt her somewhat swollen lips. "And at the moment, sweetheart, the way you're begging is wreaking havoc on my self control. I might have to give them reasons to ask questions if you don't scoot."

Now it was Hermione's turn to laugh. "Severus Snape losing control? I never thought I'd see the day."

"I'm warning you…"

His mock threat only made her laugh harder. "I'm going!" Still giggling she turned and walked away.

Severus leanded against the wall and sighed. But unlike before it was not a sigh of unhappiness or anxeity. It was a sigh of pure contentment.

Hermione hurried back to the main street of Hogsmeade and melded into the throng of students. She could have skipped or danced all the way back to the castle. Severus wanted her, and they'd made plans to see each other again. She hadn't even noticed how much she was smiling until someone next to her commented on it.

"You seem to have enjoyed the trip."

Hermione turned to see Harry striding along next to her and on his other side was a rather put out looking Ron. She couldn't help the widening of her smile. "Yes I quite enjoyed it. How was Madame Pudifoot's?"

"Fine." Harry said with a shrug. "Ginny and I only spent half our time there. She wanted to see her brothers so we went to Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. What did you do?"

Hermione swallowed. She knew she couldn't tell him the whole truth and that felt odd. Up till now she, Harry, and Ron had told each other everything. "I went exploring. I got loads of fresh air and exercise. Eventually I found a cute little shop with a book section and spent lots of time reading." She didn't mention that it was a potions shop because she didn't want him to get suspicious.

"Sounds like your kind of day." Harry commented, not completely sold on that being all she'd done. Even Hermione had to surface from books sometimes.

"How was your day, Ron?" Hermione asked, her happy mood making her diplomatic. He really didn't look happy."

"Wonderful, actually." Ron said brightening the slightest bit. "Lavender is wonderful and perfect."

"I'm so glad it's working out for you." Hermione said genuinely. "Speaking of, where are Ginny and Lavender?"

"They went on ahead with Parvarti and Luna. I guess they wanted to pick over the day with other girls." Harry shrugged.

"Probably." Hermione said.

"Don't you want to to join them?" Ron asked acidly.

"Why would I want to do that Ron? My two best friends are right here."

Ron grimaced.

"You aren't really still bent out of shape about last Saturday are you?"

"Maybe." Ron said sulkily.

"Oh, really Ronald! Can't you be a little more mature. It was one day!" She sighed. "Listen I really don't want to stop talking to you over this. Can't you just let it go?"

"Yeah, I suppose." Ron grumbled.

"Listen, Ron, Snape may no be the nicest of men, but he's a brilliant one. I learned loads from him last weekend."

Ron rolled is eyes. He looked about to gag.

Hermione hated to lie, but she had to if she wanted to keep her friends. "Ron, I was making upu my credits and helping Professor Lupin." She forced a laugh and congratulated herself on how convincing it sounded. "You're making it sound like I fancy him!"

"You don't?" Ron asked, scoffing. But softening all the same.

Hermione swallowed down the truth. "No, Ron, I don't fancy him. That's disgusting." She supressed the urge to flinch at her own words. _Severus, wherever you are, if you can here me, I'm soo sorry. I really do fancy you._ She thought.

Ron softened all the way. "Alright, I get it."

"So we're friends again?" Hermione asked.

"Yeah," Ron said happily. "As long as you don't fancy any other Slytherin you aren't telling me about.

The threat made her stomach roil in anxiety. "I don't." She assured him.


	4. What Happens in Detention

1**Redefining Nothing**

Ch.4: What Happens in Detention...

**A/N: Sorry about the delay...I typed up chapter 5 totally forgetting that this one wasn't up yet...Here you go.**

Sunday was spent in a cheerful manner. Harry, Ron, and Hermione took their homework outside to the lake shore to enjoy the crisp, clear day. Hermione got most of the work for the coming week finished. Ron and Harry focused for a while, but eventually they broke down and gave up. When Dean, Seamus, and Neville came to ask them to join in an impromptu Quidditch match, they gave in and left. Hermione finished what she was working on and then went to watch the game. The close match made for a thoroughly enjoyable afternoon.

But Monday morning brought back Hermione's sense of nervous anticipation. She had double Potions that morning and she was quite nervous about it. She was worried that she'd have a hard time pretending to be just any other Gryffindor student. Just remembering the feel of his arms holding her, clutching her, made her shiver.

An hour after breakfast, Hermione stood outside the door to Snape's dungeon classrooms. Taking a few deep breaths she strode into the room and took her seat. She set to work on her potion quietly, waiting for Snape to come near her and give her the promised detention. But the period progressed and he appeared to be avoiding her. Finally, she took matters into her own hands. She intentionally mixed up her ingredients so that a terrible smell emanated from her cauldron.

As Harry, Ron, and everyone else in the near vicinity stumbled out of the way, coughing, Snape strode over looking frightening. "What happened here?" He snapped.

"I'm sorry, sir." She said fighting down a smile. "I can fix it. Watch." Smiling internally she flicked her wand and the cauldron came to a raging boil. It began to bubble, hiss, and spit. "Oh, I'm sorry, wrong swish." She swished her wand again and the boiling liquid shot straight up out of the cauldron.

Snape flicked his own wand and the cauldron was emptied. He made a mental note to tell Hermione later that playing ditsy was not becoming to her. "Detention, Miss Granger." He said as sternly as possible. "Be in my office tonight at 8p.m. sharp." He glowered at her, but she caught the other fire burning behind his obsidian eyes. Feigning defiant disappointment she nodded.

The knowledge of her detention buoyed Hermione throughout the day, albeit secretly. Ron and Harry offered her their sympathy and pity, which she accepted graciously. The gave her several apologetic looks throughout dinner. And when she headed down to the dungeons, Ron offered a weak, "Good luck."

Butterflies took up residence in Hermione's stomach as she walked purposefully down the dungeon hallway. She knocked sharply on Snape's door and heard his barked "Come in." She entered and looked around his empty classroom. She was about to call out to him using his first name, but didn't. Some irresistible urge to hold her tongue over took her.

Her patience was rewarded when Draco Malfoy came storming out of Snape's office. "I'm telling you, Professor, Carent is a great keeper. You can't take him off the team!"

"I can Mr. Malfoy and I shall!" Snape thundered. "His behavior does not merit the privilege of playing on the House team! And I don't care what his father paid your father! His father is a lout! Now get out, my detention is here."

Malfoy turned and saw Hermione for the first time. His eyes widened. "Mudblood Granger's got detention?!"

"Shut up, Malfoy." Hermione hissed.

"Oo, slightly defensive today, aren't we Mudblood? You should learn to check your temper." He made a tsk-tsk sort of noise at her.

"I said shut it, Malfoy." Hermione growled, drawing her wand.

"Put it away, Miss Granger." Snape's silky voice was low and dangerous. "Mr. Malfoy, I believe I asked you to get out."

Still huffing, Malfoy left. The door clicked sharply behind him. Snape sighed.

"What's my detention task?" Hermione asked, smiling wryly.

"Just a moment." Snape strode to the door and tugged it open. He peered around and fired off a few hexes to make sure that the hall was empty. When he was satisfied he closed the door and locked it. He enchanted it a bit and then turned back to her. "Now no can get in and no one can listen at the door."

"So, what's my task?" Hermione pressed.

"Come here." His demanding tone was silkier than ever.

She went to him. Her arms were covered in goose bumps and her stomach fluttered. Reaching for him she wrapped her arms around his neck. "Okay, I'm here. Now what?" She asked, hugging herself tighter to him.

Snape's breathing quickened. "N-n-now..um..."

"Yes?" Hermione asked, still holding him close.

In response he dipped his head and kissed her neck. "You're supposed to be in trouble, remember?" He chastised her even though he continued kissing her neck.

"I should get in trouble more often if this is how you punish me." She laughed.

Snape nipped her neck lightly.

"If you leave a mark someone's going to notice." Hermione pointed out.

"You can wear a scarf." He countered. He nipped her again a little harder.

Hermione purred. Her heart rate accelerated as she tightened her hold on his neck. Her head fell back giving him better access to her throat. To her surprise he pulled away and unwound her arms from his neck. "Don't stop." She pleaded.

"We can't take this too far, Hermione." Severus said hoarsely. He could barely make himself speak. He wanted to cross every line, to take it so far that they could never go back. Her saddened look hurt him. "Come." he said taking her hand. "We still have nearly two hours left to do whatever we please, within reason. Let's not waste it."

Hermione allowed him to pull her along with firm insistence. At last they reached his living room. He seated her on the couch where they'd shared their first kiss. Then he meandered to one of the bookshelves and came back with two books. The first he handed to her. As she accepted it, she recognized the book that she'd been reading in Hogsmeade that Saturday.

"This book comes with a condition," Severus said.

"What's that?"

"It stays here. You are welcome to read it anytime you want, but I want it to be here with me."

"Deal." Hermione smiled at him as she opened the book.

Smiling in return, Severus took his own book and settled on the opposite end of the couch. Quietly they began to read in amiable comfort. As time passed, Hermione shifted closer. Drowsiness overtook her and as she fell asleep her head slid from Severus' shoulder to his lap. Severus was amazed at how content he felt sitting on his couch reading, with Hermione dozing in his lap. He'd fully expected that just hanging out with her would be awkward. To his surprise he found that being in a relaxed domestic setting with her was totally comfortable.

When the clock struck ten, he reluctantly decided that she should be getting back to Gryffindor Tower. He reached down and stroked her hair. "Wake up..." He whispered.

Slowly she stirred awake and her chocolate brown eyes fluttered open. "Did I fall asleep?" she asked blearily.

Severus nodded.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't want to waste our time together and now I have."

"It wasn't wasted. I didn't mind and you needed the sleep. But you should be getting back, it's 10 o'clock already. Your detention is over and people," he meant two Gryffindors in particular, "will be suspicious if you're late."

"I suppose so." Hermione agreed.

"Goodnight, my darling." Severus said, kissing her tenderly.

"Goodnight Severus."

They held hands to his door. As they got to the outer most door, he released the spells around it. Kissing her gently, he said, "Come back as soon as you wish."

"I shall be here every night if I can."

"Don't try. It would be too dangerous."

Hermione nodded. "I know. I should go."

"Yes." Severus said. He gave her one more quick kiss and then let her go.

When Hermione entered the Common Room, Harry and Ron were waiting for her. "Long detention," Ron commented yawning.

"Did he treat you terribly?" Harry asked.

Hermione shook her head. "A lot of manual cleaning and organizing." she lied.

Ron grimaced. "Yuck."

"Yeah," Hermione agreed, "it was really awful." She tried to make her voice convincing, but she wasn't sure how successful she was. "I'm just glad it was only two hours."

"No kidding." Harry agreed.

Just then, Hermione yawned. "Well, I'm off to bed. 'Night all."


	5. Dreamscapes

1**Redefining Nothing**

Ch. 5: Dreamscapes

**A/N: Thank you to everyone for the glowing reviews. They've kept me focused on where this story is going next. I want to double thank my wonderful beta ShadowC for her continual support. She gave me two ideas on where this story could go after Ch.4 and I managed to take two of them and splice them together into the longest chapter I've ever written.**

_Hermione smiled as Severus_ _strode over to her down an open corridor. He swept _

_her into his arms and kissed her passionately._

_"My Hermione." He purred between kisses along her jawline. _

_Hermione's pulse raced and she returned his kisses with equal passion. But in the back of her mind something nagged at her. Something about this didn't feel right. As he ran his hands lovingly through her hair it struck her. "Severus," _

_"Hmm?" He mumbled, kissing her cheek._

_Hermione pushed him back slightly. "Sev, someone's going to see us." she protested half-heartedly. _

_He kissed her behind the ear and then whispered, "I don't care. I'm tired of hiding. Let them find us." _

_Hermione would have protested that he should care, but his kisses were too sweet. She adored them too much. _

_When they parted her heart ached. She knew that they shouldn't be together publicly. For one thing she was his student. For another, he was a spy and she could compromise his cover. But she loved him and she hoped to god that he loved her. _

_The next night she met him in the potions room. She ran to him and entwined herself in his arms. Just as their arms clasped the room began to spin and melt. _

_"What's happening?" Hermione called, clinging to Severus' arms._

_"I don't know." He responded._

_As suddenly as it had begun the spinning stopped. They were standing in a rather ancient looking ballroom. The room was dark, but Hermione could make out the shadow of silver serpents on the walls. The only light was the sort of eery blue light that comes right before dawn. Hermione quivered. "Where are we?"_

_"I'm not sure." Severus' voice was low and worried._

_Suddenly light flooded the room as fire blazed to life in a hearth big enough for three men to stand in. As a pair, they whirled to face it. As they did, a high-pitched, cackling hiss issued from behind them. _

_"Severus, kind of you to join us. And I see that you saw fit to bring Miss Granger along. Good, good. Two birds, one stone. She'll enjoy the show." The voice hissed. It was accompanied by the figure of Lord Voldemort striding into the firelight. "Come here, Severus." Voldemort ordered. "You must be curious as to why you are here. Why I brought you here."_

_"Run, Hermione." Severus whispered to her. Then he stepped forward._

_Hermione turned to run, but Voldemort's cold voice stopped her in her tracks. "Not so fast Miss Granger. I want you to stay and watch." _

_Against her will, Hermione was whirled around. Whatever spell Voldemort was wielding forced her into a high backed wooden chair. She screamed as chains snaked up from nowhere to bind her to the chair. She writhed in horror as her wrists were bound to the chair arms, her ankles to the chair legs, and her torso to the chair back. "Severus, h–" she choked off and found herself unable to speak. _

_"Ah-ah-ah." Voldemort chastised. "That won't do." He turned from her to face Severus._

_"My Lord, please leave her out of this." Severus begged. "She has nothing to do with this."_

_"SHE HAS EVERYTHING TO DO WITH IT!!" Voldemort raged. "I trusted you as my most high profile spy. Watch Potter and his friends. Report to me on the doings of three sixteen year olds. And you let the Mudblood seduce you. It's disgusting! '_Crucio'_!"_

_Severus screamed as the curse set him writhing in agony. "Please my Lord. She did nothing. I pursued her. I love her." Severus pleaded between gasps of pain._

_Voldemort lifted the curse. Severus stayed kneeling on the floor panting. " I would have expected you to have better taste. However your obvious love for the girl requires punishment." _

_Severus cringed. "Please," he whispered, "let Hermione alone." _

_"Touching." Voldemort said sarcastically. "But I really think she ought to go first. That way you can watch. In recognition of your love," he choked over the word, "for her perhaps a spell of your own creation? SECTUMSEMPRA!" _

_Hermione screamed as a raw, bleeding gash was torn open on her chest. She could feel the warm blood poring down her robes. The pain was white hot and searing. Vaguely she heard Voldemort place Severus back under the Cruciatus Curse. She heard Severus scream, and the only coherent word in his shrieks_ _was her name. _

_"Severus,... Severus,... Severus!" she cried out to him. _

_"Avada Kedavra!" Voldemort shrieked, with a hint of a laugh in his voice. Green light flashed and Hermione watched Severus crumple. _

_"NOOO!" She yelled._

_"Your next." Voldemort said advancing on her._

Hermione sat bolt upright in the dark. A cold sweat drenched her body and green

light blinded her eyes. In her mind she could still hear screams of agony and Voldemort laughing. She glanced at her clock. It read 2a.m. She reached for her wand and whispered, "Accio Invisibility Cloak!"

A few moments later, Harry's Invisibility Cloak zoomed into the room. She pulled a bathrobe over her nightgown and the cloak over that. Silently she slipped out of Gryffindor Tower. Quickly and quietly she slid down to the dungeons.

She knocked on the door that led to Severus' office. After several knocks he answered dressed in a black flannel shirt and matching pants. His hair was rumpled from sleep. "Hello?" he called to the seemingly empty hallway.

Hermione pulled off the cloak. "Thank goodness." She gasped, throwing her arms around his neck.

"You just saw me not four hours ago." Severus said, surprised to see tears in her eyes.

"I had to make sure you were alright. I had the most terrible dream." She whispered.

"Would you like to come in and tell me about it?" Severus asked kindly. He was tired but he could see that she needed him and he deeply wanted to comfort her.

"Yes." She murmured. Holding her delicately, Severus led the way to his kitchen. Minutes later they were seated at his table with hot cups of tea.

"What did you dream about?"

"We decided to let people know about us. And Voldemort found out. I don't know how. He tortured you, he hurt me with your spell, he made me watch him kill you. I had to make sure that you were alright. In my dream, I had to hear you beg for my life. I woke up with your screams in my ears." Tears flowed silently down her cheeks. "We can't do this, Severus. I'm going to get you hurt. I'm not worth it." True sobs began to wrack her frame.

Severus felt like his heart was being ripped from his chest. He didn't want to believe that she really wanted to end it like this. Rising from his chair he went to her and pushed her chair back from the table. Kneeling in front of her he took her hands. "That isn't going to happen. He won't find out. And I won't let him hurt you, ever. You really are worth it. He rose up on his knees and cradled her to him. He stroked her hair and kissed her face and neck. "You're so beautiful Hermione...so beautiful."

"But what if You-Know-Who finds out. What if he gets his hands on me. My memories show you in a kind light. Worse yet they show you being loving to a Gryffindor. Don't you see? I'm a danger to you."

"I don't care." Severus said adamantly.

"Don't say that!" Hermione yelled, pulling away from him and backing away. "That's what you said in my dream, right before...Oh god!!" A fresh torrent of tears broke loose. "I..-we...can't." she sobbed.

Severus watched her as she stood and full two yards from him. She quivered with sobs. He felt so helpless. Whatever she'd seen in her nightmare wasn't real, but he didn't know how to convince her of that. Doing the only thing he could, he went to her and wrapped her in his arms. She cried against his shoulder and he just held her. He kept the contact as simple yet loving as possible. She continued to blubber her protests between sobs. Finally, it irritated him. Holding her at arms length he stared her full in the face. "Do you want this to end?" he growled.

"N-n-no. I j-just don't w-w-want to see y-you hurt." She stammered.

"I'm not in any danger." He assured her. "Voldemort doesn't need to ever see your memories of me. And if something goes horribly, terribly wrong and he does find them, I can make him believe that they are mere fantasies." He smiled wryly. "Trust me."

"I trust you." Hermione said as she relaxed in his arms. She tensed again though when he bent and scooped her into his arms, bridal style.

"Close your eyes, my Gryffindor." Severus whispered in her ear. He held her small frame close and waited to move until he was sure her eyes were shut.

Hermione closed her eyes and waited patiently for Severus' command to open them again. She was surprised to feel padding beneath her back as he laid her down on something soft.

"Open your eyes, my darling." he whispered.

She opened her eyes and gazed around. Shock settled in slowly as her eyes met a wardrobe, a chair, and a door to a smaller room. Sitting up and looking behind her, it finally hit home that she was lying on his bed. It was a big bed made of a dark wood. A down comforter covered it and it was on this that she now lay. "Why?" she asked in confused amazement.

Severus chuckled. "Because it's two thirty in the morning, and I want some rest, but I want to hold you as well." He sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled his socks off. That done, he slid under the covers. Smiling, Hermione joined him. Severus rolled over, and wound his arms around her narrow waist.

Hermione wiggled around so that she could comfortably lay her head on his chest. She ran her arms around his neck. They just lay there, relishing their closeness, and eventually, Hermione drifted off to sleep.

Harry woke up at 3a.m. as was his habit. He'd taken to consulting the Marauder's Map at odd hours in order to establish the teachers' watch schedule. He saw McGonagall, Sprout, and Sinistra on patrol in addition to Filch and Mrs. Norris. He marked down the date, time, and teacher's names. He scanned the map for Snape and found him in his dungeons as usual. But his system received a jolt when he say Hermione's dot next to Snape's. _Its 3a.m. What is Hermione doing there at this time? _He wondered to himself.

To rationalize the event, he convinced himself that it was just that the map had gotten old. The charm was wearing off and it thought that Hermione was still in detention. He would make a point to ask Sirius about it tomorrow and that would solve it. He rolled over and went back to sleep.

Severus woke Hermione up around forty-thirty. "'Mione, time to get back to your dorm." He whispered, kissing her awake.

Hermione groaned and rolled over. "Is it morning already?"

"Late enough." Severus said. He was laying on his back staring moodily at the ceiling.

Hermione crawled over and lay on her stomach on top of him. "What's the matter, Sev?" she asked.

Severus took a deep, steadying breath. "I wish so much that you didn't ever have to leave me, Hermione." He said. Without looking at her he wound his arms around her and stroked his hands through her hair.

"Then I'll never leave. Say the word and I'll never be more than an arms length from you." she said pressing herself closer to him.

"You have to finish your schooling, my darling. But if I could make it so, I would." Severus kissed her forcefully. His hands ranged from her shoulders down to her lower back. His kiss was passionate and furious. Hermione had to fight to keep pace with him. At last they parted, breathless and panting.

"You should go." Severus said.

"Yes." Hermione agreed, remorsefully.

Minutes later, Hermione slipped under Harry's cloak and out of Severus' door. She worked her way carefully back to Gryffindor Tower. She charmed the cloak back into Harry's trunk and slipped into her own dormitory. When the others awoke and came down, Hermione was dressed and sitting in the Common Room.

"Good morning, Hermione." Ron offered as he came down the boy's stairs, still yawning.

"Good morning Ron. Good morning, Harry." Hermione said brightly, looking up from her book. "How did you sleep?"

"Well thanks." Harry answered. "You?"

"Splendidly. Shall we go to breakfast?"

Harry hung back after Defense Against the Dark Arts later that morning.

"Come on, Harry!" Ron urged. "Let's go to lunch."

"You and Hermione go on ahead, Ron. I need to talk to Sirius for a minute." Harry said. Ron shrugged and he and Hermione left.

When all the other students had left the room, Harry approached the teachers' desk. "Professor Lupin?" He inquired.

Remus looked up. "What can I help you with, Harry?" He asked kindly.

"I need to speak with Sirius." Harry said.

"Alright. He should be in his office." Remus said pointing to one of the two smoked glass doors in the back wall.

"Thanks." Harry said. He hurried to the door and knocked.

"Come in." Sirius barked.

Harry opened the door and entered. "Do you have a minute?" he asked.

Sirius looked up and smiled at his godson. "Always for you, Harry. How have you been?"

"Great actually." Harry said sitting down opposite Sirius.

Sirius smiled. "What was it you wanted to talk to me about?"

"This." Harry held up an old brown piece of parchment.

"The Marauder's Map? Why?"

"I think that the charm is wearing off. It's sticking."

"Sticking, hm? Let me see." Sirius said gravely. He tapped the page with is wand and muttered "I solemnly swear I'm up to no good." Ink slowly spread across the page in a perfect floor plan of the Hogwarts castle. Sirius checked the location of different teachers who could be expected to be in their classrooms. They were all right where they should be. Right down to Remus in the office next door. "Everything appears to be fine with it."

"That can't be." Harry exclaimed, puzzled.

"Why not?" Sirius asked.

"Last night Hermione had detention with Snape." Harry started. Sirius' eyebrows rose in curiosity. "And she came back around ten o'clock. I was her come back, and Ron did too. Then I woke up at 3 a.m. last night and couldn't sleep so I checked the map for the heck of it."

Sirius scoffed as if he didn't believe that was really why Harry checked the map. He knew that it wasn't, but he wouldn't chastise Harry for it. He and James had done much the same once.

"The map said that Hermione was still in Snape's dungeons. What would she have been doing there at 3a.m.?"

"She wouldn't be there." Sirius said plainly. "She shouldn't be. I'm sure she wasn't really there, Harry. But I don't know why the map said she was. Do you mind if I keep it for a while to see if it does it again?"

"Sure. Go ahead." Harry said. "Thanks Sirius. I knew that you could help." He rose to leave.

"See you tomorrow Harry." Sirius smiled pleasantly at him. When Harry had gone he began staring at the Marauder's Map. A few minutes later Remus knocked on his door and entered.

"What did Harry want?" He asked.

Sirius explained the situation to him along with Harry's concerns and theory.

Remus' brow furrowed. "But we all put charms on it to keep the spell and James bound them."

"I know." Sirius said.

"Did you tell Harry that?" Remus asked.

"No." Sirius said. "You know Harry. He would have tried to fix it himself. He would have done something rash if I'd told him."

Remus smiled at his friend. "So you stopped Harry from doing something rash so you could run off and do just that." He mused.

"I never said–"

"Sirius, how long have we been friends?" Remus cut him off.

"Twenty years and then some." Sirius guessed.

"Exactly." Remus continued. "I know how you operate. You and James never let an offense slide. Ever. Why would I think that you wouldn't defend your godson's best friend?"

"You know me too well, Moony." Sirius sighed at last.

"Let it go Sirius." Remus advised him with a stern look. "At least until you have more concrete evidence than a glance Harry took at the map at 3a.m."

Sirius nodded. He knew that it wouldn't convince Remus but it was worth a try.

Remus was as unconvinced as Sirius suspected he'd be. "Do it for Harry's sake." He pleaded. "The boy is finally happy now that he's living with you. Don't take that way from him because you lost your temper with another teacher."

That time he really got through to Sirius. Sirius loved having Harry living with him. It broke the loneliness he'd become used to and was like having a son of his own. "I won't say anything to Severus without more proof, but when I get that proof, Remus, nothing you say will stop me."

"I won't even try." Remus looked at his watch. "Well, I ought to be getting home. I'll be back this time tomorrow."

Sirius nodded. His teaching agreement with Remus was in 24-hour shifts. For now Sirius would teach the afternoon classes, do night watch, and teach the morning. Then they'd switch. It was terribly boring for Sirius but it allowed Remus more time with his family. "Give my regards to Tonk and little Teddy." Sirius said.

"As always." Remus promised, stepping into Sirius' fireplace and throwing down some Floo powder.


	6. Confrontations

1**Redefining Nothing**

Ch.6: Confrontations

**A/N: Again, many thanks to all of you who have stuck with this and sorry for the delay in updating. I had some trouble getting this chapter going, but once it started it was off like a firecracker so I hope you all enjoy. Please review. I'd love to hear your thoughts. **

Nearly a week went by without allowing any time for Severus and Hermione to meet. On Thursday Hermione turned in her Potions work while smiling to herself. She had magically concealed the note attached so that only Severus could read it and she was anxious for a response.

Feeling the magic that was worked around Hermione's paper, Severus thumbed through it on his break. He smiled when he found the source of the enchantment. A little scrap of parchment was attached to the rest and thoroughly invisible to anyone else. It read:

_My Dearest Severus,_

_When can we next meet? I fear I shall burst if I can't hold you soon._

_All my love,_

_Hermione_

Quickly he grabbed a scrap of parchment from his own desk drawer and began hunting for a quill. He found one by poking his hand on the tip and knocking into an ink jar in the process of pulling his hand back. Luckily the ink didn't tip over or break. Finally he managed to gather ink and quill without incident and wrote a note back.

_Hermione,_

_ We will meet soon my darling, I promise you._

_-Severus_

But he found upon concluding the note that he couldn't bring himself to write anything that even implied the words 'I love you'. The last woman he'd said those words to had broken his heart. He'd loved her so passionately and when she'd married his rival his heart had frozen. He could no longer say the words that had come so easily to him then. They meant nothing to him any more. Or at least not anything strong and lasting. _Then why does it make your heart thrill when Hermione says it. That's a bit hypocritical isn't it, Severus?" _That conscience like voice asked.

Severus had not answer for that. All he knew was that for years now Harry Potter had been a constant reminder of Lily Evans' betrayal. He wanted to believe that Hermione would never betray him, but he couldn't bring himself to take the risk. He had spent so many years fighting the wound that Lily had torn in him that he didn't want to face even the possibility of that happening again. He'd couldn't survive it. He'd never meant to get attached to anyone ever again, but Hermione had come along and slowly she was changing that.

Sighing to himself, he rolled and sealed the note and whistled. His black raven hopped from her perch and soared over to him. He attached the note to her leg. "Syra, take this to Hermione – secretly." Syra clicked her beak twice, her typical signal that she understood. He stroked her head and then carried her to the window. That was one of the advantages of being a spy. His courier had to be able to deliver secret messages. Perfect for spying...and conducting illicit affairs. He smiled at the thought.

However, against the wishes of both parties, Hermione and Severus were forced to remain apart for close to two more weeks due to the upcoming semester exams. At last another opportunity presented itself. As soon as the date for the next Hogsmeade trip was released to the staff, Severus jumped to tell Hermione. He quickly scratched out a note that read:

_My darling, meet me at Brewer's Dream as soon as you can on this Saturday's trip to Hogsmeade village. _

_Yours,_

_ Severus_

He magically concealed it within the essay of hers that he was planning to return that day and waited.

Hermione could have screamed with delight when she saw the note. She had been practically driven insane by their forced separation. She'd been looking out for his beautiful raven for days now.

The day of the Hogsmeade trip, Hermione began to worry about telling Harry and Ron that she wouldn't be joining them. Fortunately, she wasn't the only one with alternative plans. Over breakfast Ron made an announcement. "Lavender wants to spend time together today, just the two of us." He said around a mouthful of eggs.

"Oh, I'm glad you're busy." Harry said, sounding relieved. "Ginny wanted the same thing. We haven't had much time together between Quidditch practice and homework. Are you going to be alright if we ditch out on you, Hermione?"

Hermione smiled. "I can entertain myself just fine, thanks." She said sarcastically. "Enjoy yourselves and tell Lavender and Ginny I said 'hello'."

"We will." Harry promised. "Enjoy your day."

Hermione smiled again and got up from the table. "Well, I'm off. See you both later."

"See you." Ron said.

Hermione was forced to walk at the pace of the crowd on the way to the village. Once she was on the back streets, however, she practically ran to Brewer's Dream. She threw open the door and burst inside. At the gush of cold air and the bang of the door, Severus rose form a corner chair. Hermione flew to him and wrapped her arms around him. "I thought I was going to go insane." she exclaimed as she kissed his jaw.

"_You _were going insane?" Severus scoffed. "I had to teach you most days. Having you right there on my territory and not being allowed to touch you..._**that**_, my sweet Gryffindor, was torture." Severus said, as he returned her kisses.

"Your torture is over, my heart." Hermione whispered, pressing against him.

Severus held her to him fiercely. "Shall we go sit in our café?" He asked at last.

"Yes." Hermione whispered.

Severus released her, but he paused. "There are more teachers that normal in the village today. We should go separate ways."

Hermione nodded and kissed him again.

I'll leave first. Wait a while then follow." Severus instructed.

Harry entered Hogsmeade with a smile on his face. He had made plans to meet Ginny at Weasley's Wizard Wheezes and he couldn't wait to see her. Just as he was turning for the joke shop he saw Draco Malfoy slipping down a side alley. Oddly the Slytherin was alone.

Curious, Harry deviated form his course to follow Malfoy. He checked his watch. He still had half an hour before he had to meet Ginny. He followed Malfoy at a safe distance, using a spell to muffle his footsteps. They worked their way along the back streets, through rows of warehouses and dingy shops.

Draco accelerated and rounded the next corner. Harry hurried to catch him and found himself faced with a four way intersection. He turned right, since there were dusty footprints leading that way.

He froze in his tacks half-way down the street as he heard a door creak open. He watched Professor Snape swoop out of the shop and off down the street away from Harry, apparently with out seeing him. Breathing a sigh of relief, Harry waited for a few minutes to be sure that Snape wasn't going to come back. He was just about to move forward again, when the door opened a second time. To his surprise, Hermione strolled out and turned toward him. "Hermione!" He called out.

She looked up and surprise flashed across her face. "Harry!" She exclaimed. "What are you doing here? I thought you were meeting Ginny."

"I'm meeting her in a few minutes. I was tailing Malfoy. What are you doing here? Did you see Snape in there?"

Hermione fought furiously against a blush as she thought of what she was doing there. "I was looking at ingredients in a potion shop. I saw Professor Snape briefly. He looked to be placing an order." She shrugged. "We didn't talk."

Harry wasn't buying it. Hermione's cheeks were red and their was a bright new twinkle in her eye. Snape and Hermione had departed suspiciously close together. He firmly doubted that it was entirely coincidental.

"Where are you meeting Ginny?" Hermione asked, to change the subject.

"The Weasley joke shop." Harry said vaguely, still pondering his new evidence.

"Enjoy." Hermione said and began to walk past him.

"I'm headed back this way too." Harry said hurrying to catch up to her.

"I'm not going back to town just yet." Hermione said. "I want to explore some more. There's supposed to be some really cute little shops back in here somewhere."

Harry nodded, unconvinced. "Enjoy yourself and don't get lost."

"I won't." Hermione said, with a smile. "Tell Ginny 'hey' for me."

"I already promised I would." Harry said as he turned down the street that would take him back to the main street.

When he was out of sight, Hermione took off running. By the time she arrived at their café she was panting. Severus was standing outside waiting for her when she stopped.

"Good heavens." He exclaimed. "What has you running like a bat out of hell?"

She grimaced at him. "Harry saw us both leaving Brewer's Dream. I told him that it was a coincidence and escaped by telling him that I wanted to explore. He was going to see Ginny anyway." She panted

"Sounds like that went well." Severus said.

Hermione shook her head. "I don't think he bought it." She said glumly. "I think he suspects that something is going on. He might talk to Ron...or worse, to Sirius."

"Well, then we shall cross that bridge when it comes to it." Reaching out, he pulled her close against him. He leaned in to whisper in her ear. "But right now, I'm hungry."

His low silky purr made Hermione shiver. "Mmm..." She purred back pulling herself tighter to him.

Severus dipped his head to kiss her neck. It might have gotten out of control, but just then both of their stomachs growled in unison. The moment of tension shattered as they both laughed.

"Inconvenient hunger can sure ruin a moment." Severus grumbled.

Hermione pecked his cheek. "Shall we go inside?" she asked, smiling and taking his hand.

"I guess." He said, still pretending to pout.

Hermione laughed at him and led the way into the restaurant. The same waitress seated them. They ordered and she left.

"How have you been?" Hermione asked him, trying to start a conversation.

"Irritable." Severus admitted. "You make me so much happier. I go so crazy without you around that I'm not sure how many of my first years will be brave enough to come back to class on Monday."

Hermione chuckled. "You shouldn't take that out on them. It's not their fault that we can't be together all the time."

"I know, but I can't yell at the Minister of Magic when he makes idiotic policies. I do have the power to yell at a bunch on inept eleven year olds all I want though."

"I'll make you a deal. I turn seventeen in a couple of months. If you'll stop yelling at first years for no reason, then we can go and spit in the Minister's face together." Hermione promised. But then she qualified it with, "If we're still together."

"There is no 'if' about it Hermione." Severus promised.

Hermione smiled weakly. "You don't know that. You could tire of me eventually."

Severus' response was waylaid by the arrival of their food. Silently he cursed his inability to tell her how much he really did love her. The realization startled him and scared him, but there it was. All that remained was to win his battle with his old demons.

Sirius Black jumped and grabbed for his wand when the door to his office abruptly banged open. In his surprise he sent the papers he'd been grading flying off his desk. AS his adrenaline levels dropped back to normal he realized that he was pointing his wand at his godson. "Harry! I'm sorry, old habit." he explained, lowering his wand. "You really startled me."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to." Harry said, turning to shut the door.

Sirius noted that Harry seemed oddly agitated and on edge. "Have a seat." he offered.

"I'll stand thanks." Harry said.

"Suit yourself." Sirius was struck suddenly by how like James this behavior was. Whenever James Potter was troubled or anxious, he was flighty and restless around friends. "What's on you mind, Harry?" He asked, retaking his seat.

Harry fixed him with his bright green eyes. "The Marauder's Map wasn't wrong that night was it? It's not just aging." It wasn't a question.

Sirius sighed. "Your father's spells prevent it from aging."

"If you knew that Hermione was really with Snape at 3am, why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want you to do something stupid." Sirius explained. "Harry, what brought this realization on?"

Harry sank into a chair. "I saw them together in Hogsmeade today." His voice was heavily laden with dejection and disgust.

Sirius balked. He couldn't imagine them going public so fast. "Please explain."

Harry told Sirius what he'd seen. "But I don't think it was just a coincidence."

"Why not?" Sirius breathed as shock and anger settled in.

"Hermione looked like Ginny does when she arrives for one of our dates. Sort of lit up from the inside out. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were twinkling." Harry explained. "That's not like Hermione."

"No, I'll agree with you there." Sirius said. "Hermione doesn't glow."

"What are we going to do, Sirius?" Harry asked urgently. "Snape has got to be forcing her into this somehow. Hermione values her education too much to voluntarily begin an affair with a teacher. Not to mention with Snape."

"We are not going to do anything. You are going to continue on as if nothing has changed. Above all do not alienate Hermione or anger Snape unnecessarily. I am going to have a little chat with our Potions Master." Sirius said calmly.

"But Sirius I want to help!!" Harry cried, enraged.

"No. If I get fired I can get another job, but I doubt Dumbledore would fire me. However, it is not entirely up to Dumbledore whether or not someone is expelled. I don't want you in that kind of trouble. Will you promise to stay out of it?"

"But Sirius-" Harry started again.

Sirius cut him off sharply. "No buts. Promise me you'll stay out of it."

"Fine. I promise." Harry grumbled.

"Thank you." Sirius said. "I'll talk to Snape on Monday."

Harry nodded and stood. "Well, goodnight then. And thanks."

Sirius smiled. "Goodnight, Harry."

After the last class on Monday, Sirius stormed down to the dungeons. He waved his wand and the door to Snape's office flew open. He entered and the door snapped shut behind him. As soon as the door was shut he rounded on a very startled Snape. "How...Dare...You!" He growled.

Severus glared at him. "I shall give you the pleasure of me asking: What are you talking about?" He asked icily.

"How dare you seduce a student!"

"I repeat: What are you on about?" Severus sighed in irritation.

"How are you coercing her? Potion? Spell? Blackmail?"

"Who?!" Severus shouted in frustration.

"Don't play dumb! You know who I mean!" Severus snarled.

"No, dog, I honestly don't!"

"Hermione Granger! I know you've been seeing her romantically." Sirius accused.

"Prove it." Severus challenged, but inside he quivered. He was worried about what exactly it was that Sirius knew.

"I know she was here a few weeks ago at 3am. And a student saw you together in Hogsmeade on Saturday."

"Potter I assume."Snape muttered.

"How did you seduce her?"

"I didn't!" Severus protested. "I didn't seduce her I mean. We enjoy each others company if you must know."

"Than what was she doing here at that hour?" Sirius demanded.

Severus sighed. He knew that Sirius would never believe him. "She'd had a nightmare involving me getting hurt. It disturbed her and she came to see if I was alright. I comforted her."

"In your bed?" Sirius growled scathingly.

"No!" Severus countered. "I held her as she cried. She came to me distraught. Seduction had absolutely nothing to do with it."

Sirius scoffed. "You expect me to believe that you really didn't sleep with her?!"

"Yes." Severus said. He was growing weary of this debate.

"Prove it." Sirius snarled, turning Snape's own words against him.

"Fine." Severus retorted. He cleared his mind of all but that night, locking the rest away. "You've learned Occlumency, I presume you know it's opposite."

"Yes."

"Very well." Severus took on the tone he used with particularly inept first years. "Preform it on me and you shall have your answers."

Sirius was stunned. I was unheard of for Severus Snape to allow people into his mind. Nevertheless he readied himself and preformed spell. "Legilimens."

His view of Snape's office twisted and slipped. He found himself looking at a crystal clear view of Snape striding to the door and opening it. He watched as though it was all happening for the first time as Hermione threw her arms around Severus. It shocked him to see in her eyes a deep level of affection, even love. He watched until she left. Then he felt himself being pushed out of Snape's mind. As he returned to him own consciousness, he was stricken by the truth of Snape's relationship with Hermione.

"I told you so." Snape said.

Sirius nodded. "If you hurt her, I'll hurt you." He promised.

Severus looked him squarely in the eye. "I won't hurt her. Ever." He vowed.

Sirius might once have contended this claim merely in order to argue with Severus. But he detected a strength and conviction of feeling in Snape that he'd once assumed the dark man incapable of. Instead of challenging him further, he nodded and said, "That is all I would ask. I'll take my leave."

Severus nodded and retook his seat at his desk.

Sirius turned and left the dungeons, still rattled. He'd never in a million years believed that Severus had a heart. Nor would he have thought him likely to fall in love with a Gryffindor. But love her he did, Sirius decided.

Severus sat in his office feeling emotionally drained. It had taken a lot for him to show Sirius those memories. They were intensely personal to a withdrawn man like him. But more than that, he was still unsure of his exact feelings for Hermione and it made him feel guilty that someone else knew what he couldn't tell her.

He closed his eyes and a small smile broke his features as he replayed that night. In his mind's eye he watched her sleep and felt her snugged close to him. A knock on his office door woke him from his reverie. "Come in." He called, trying not to sound angry.

The door opened and then closed, but no one appeared to enter the room. After a few seconds the air in front of the door rippled and Hermione appeared holding a silver cloak. She said nothing, but came right to him and kissed him. She looked up into his eyes and brushed his lank hair out of his face. "You look stressed, my heart." she said.

"Long afternoon." He said focusing on her bright eyes.

Hermione nodded, and took his hand. "Come on. I'll make you some tea." With that she led him down to his own living quarters.

Severus allowed her to sit him down and told her where to find the things needed to make tea. He enjoyed watching her bustle around his kitchen.

She noticed his smile and stopped. "What are smiling at?" she asked.

"You." Severus said, pulling her into his lap. "I love having you in my home. It makes me happy to see you comfortable here."

Hermione looked around, and settled her head in the crook of his neck. "I enjoy being here. It feels like I belong."

Severus kissed her firmly.

When they parted, Hermione tried to rise from his lap. "The tea is almost ready." she said.

Severus pulled her back to him. He looked at her seriously. "I want you here all the time, but since that can't happen, I do want you to make you to make yourself happy here. Come here if you need comfort. Please?"

It was Hermione's turn to initiate the kiss. As she sat in his lap she pushed his head back and kissed him passionately. He held her around the waist. Her hands played through his hair in massage like patterns. Just then the kettle began to whistle. Hermione gave one last twist and press to her kiss, then scampered off his lap. He growled unhappily and reached for her, but she darted past his hands.

"No, no, no..." She purred, laughing at him.


	7. Escape

1**Redefining Nothing**

Ch. 7: A Get Away

**A/N: Sorry about the delays on getting this written. I find I actually write less on school breaks, perhaps because I'm so busy with family stuff. Anyway, it stalled for the two weeks I was on break. But I put the petal to the metal and I hope it meets your expectations**

A few days later, Severus was stretched out on his couch. Hermione sat between his legs with her back against his chest. Severus was grading first year essays while running a hand idly through Hermione's hair. Hermione was reading half-heartedly.

Severus set aside the paper he was reading with a frustrated sigh. He burrowed further down into the couch and wrapped his arms around Hermione. "'Mione?"

"Hmm?"

"What are you doing over the Christmas holidays?"

"What?" Hermione asked in surprise. That had come out of nowhere.

"I mean are you going home."

"Oh." Hermione recovered. "No, I'm planning on staying here. Mum and Dad decided to go on a Mediterranean Cruise. I don't want to be home alone." Her brow furrowed. "Why do you ask?"

Severus smiled devilishly. "Would you care to take a real vacation?"

Hermione rolled onto her stomach so that she could look at him. "What do you mean?"

"Well," Severus inhaled to boost his courage. "I'm off over Christmas break this year. I keep a fortress up north that I go to when I'm not here. I want you to accompany me."

"Wow." Hermione breathed. "Umm...Is that allowed?"

"No one has to know. If you sneak to Hogsmeade, but don't get on the train you'll be able to pull it off. I Apparate home from the village. You can Side-Along with me."

Hermione let out a giggle of hysterical happiness. She crawled up his chest and kissed him.

"I'll take that as a 'yes'".

Hermione just smiled and cradled her head on his collar bone. "Two whole weeks alone with you, huh?"

"Is that a bad thing?"

"That depends entirely on what kind of vacationer you are." Hermione pointed out with a chuckle.

"I like to relax." Severus said. "I have a pretty fair sized library and deep comfortable couches."

Hermione hid a smile. "I guess I could stand it." She said, feigning indifferent annoyance.

"You guess?" Severus asked in mock-anger. "You guess?"

Hermione sighed exaggeratedly. "Yes, I suppose."

"I might just have to forcibly extract a 'yes' form you." Severus growled. He began to tickle her anywhere he could reach.

She squirmed and wiggled trying to avoid his hands. Soon she was giggling and gasping at the same time. "Ow, ow!" She gasped. "Stop!"

"Ah, ah, ah...ask nicely, Hermione." Severus chastised her. He renewed his attack.

"AH!" She gasped. She writhed under his torturous touch. "Please! Please, Sev!"

"Please what?"

"Please stop, Severus." She begged.

He stopped immediately. She flopped on his chest, panting. Raising her fist she pounded it into his shoulder.

He grunted. "Ouch. What was that for?"

"Jerk." Hermione mumbled against his chest.

He chuckled low in his throat and kiss the top of her head. "I adore it when you beg." He murmured.

"I adore _you._" Hermione said. "Even when you insist on annoying me."

They were silent for a minute. At length Severus spoke. "I never dared to dream that I would ever hear that from you."

"How long have you dreamt anything of me?"

"I always admired your intellect even if you were a know-it-all Gryffindor." He smiled to soften the blow. "By your fourth year you'd matured enough that I began to think you pretty. So it has stayed for the past three years. Then when you came back this September, you were so beautiful. I took my mind and ran with it. I could think of noting else. Then that Saturday I had you here with me and I couldn't stop myself. My feelings have just snowballed since then."

Hermione purred and stretched up to kiss his nose. She settled back down on his chest with her ear over his heart. "My first years here you scared me senseless. Then this year, Ron started kidding me about you fancying me. Suddenly I started to see you as a man not just my formidable teacher. I started to think about you more and more often. Now I can't get you off my mind."

Severus rested his cheek on the top of her head. "I need you too." He whispered.

Only a week remained until the Christmas holidays and the bustle of the castle was now almost a roar. The winter exams were nearly upon the students and everyone was busying studying, planning for Christmas, and packing. Hermione spent most of her time studying with Ron and Harry. Over breakfast that Monday, Harry spoke up.

"Are you going home, Hermione?"He asked.

Hermione swallowed her mouthful delicately. "No. Mum and Dad decided to take a cruise." She said evenly. "I'm staying here."

"Do you want to come to Grimmauld Place? The Lupins and the Weasley's are coming for Christmas dinner." Harry offered.

"No thanks. I'm looking forward to reading in peace and maybe getting some advanced Transfiguration from Professor McGonagall." Hermione lied.

Harry shrugged. "Suit yourself."

Ron made no comment.

After breakfast, on their way to Potions, Ron disappeared off with Lavender. Harry walked silently next to Hermione for a while. At last he spoke up. "Listen, whatever you're up really up to over break, just make sure it's what you really want."

"What are you talking about?" Hermione asked, trying not to let her nerves show.

"I know your not staying here...or at least not alone." Harry said. "Just don't let Snape talk you into anything you're not ready for."

"How do you know that?" She asked stunned.

"I was suspicious so I gave Sirius the evidence I had and he went to talk to Snape. He told me about it. He said seemed pretty gone for you. Just promise me you'll be careful, alright?"

Hermione's jaw clenched in fury. "How dare he! How dare you! I can handle my own life without you and Sirius babysitting me all the time! Leave me alone!" With that she stormed off to the dungeons.

Severus noted that Hermione seemed disgruntled during Potions. But she also seemed to be avoiding him. He meant to talk to her about it, but she left too quickly. Her exams kept them apart for the rest of the week, but finally on Friday night she came to him.

She didn't run into his arms like she usually did. Instead she maintained her distance and watched him warily.

"Is something wrong?" He asked finally.

Hermione looked away and was silent for a moment. When she looked back at him there were tears in her eyes. "Why?" She asked.

"Why what?"

"Why did you tell Sirius?"

"How-..."

"He told Harry, who took it upon himself to warn me to be careful over break."

"Oh, God. I didn't know he'd go running to Harry. I'll kill him! Listen, I didn't mean for you to have to deal with this."

"So...what? You were going to hide it? You didn't answer the question. Why did you tell him?"

"I had to." Severus said.

"Why?" Hermione pressed.

Severus sighed. "He was accusing me of seducing you against your will. He would have gone to Dumbledore. I didn't want to loose you! I had to tell him." He tried to hide the desperation in his voice, but he failed. "He wouldn't believe me, so I had to show him!"

"You showed him what?"

"That night after you had the dream. He wouldn't believe me unless he saw it."

"You showed him? You let him invade your mind?"

Severus nodded. He do it the same way if he was given the choice again.

Hermione's anger melted away. She realized that he'd broken every code he had for her. "For me?" she asked.

"For us." Severus corrected. "I can't lose you."

"You're not going to lose me." Hermione promised him.

A few minutes later they were seated at his table with tea. "So what is your plan for tomorrow?" Severus asked, taking her hand.

"Well I told Harry and Ron that I was staying. My professors, minus you, think I'm going. I'm going to sneak to Hogsmeade under an invisibility spell and wait for you."

"Sounds brilliant. What about your things?"

"I can shrink my trunk down to fit in my pocket."

"Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant my stunning Gryffindor. You think of everything." Severus praised her. It was silent for a while before he spoke. "Are you as excited as I am?" He asked finally.

"Nervous excited yes." Hermione said.

"Nervous?"

"It's nothing. Its just...well...so many things could go wrong."

"But nothing will." Severus promised her.

The next morning, Hermione paced, invisible, in the street outside Brewer's Dream. As her watch clicked to ten the Hogwarts express blew it's horn. As ten-thirty struck, Severus came striding down the street. "Hermione? Are you there?" He whispered.

Hermione took his hand. "I'm here."

"Are you ready?"

Hermione felt her pocket to make sure that the dice sized lump that was her trunk was there. That done, she nodded.

"Hermione? Did you hear me?" Severus asked.

"Didn't you see my nod just now?" Hermione asked in response.

"Um, no. You're invisible remember!"

Hermione chuckled in embarassment. "Oh, right." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm ready."

"Good. Hold on tight." When she had a sufficient vice grip on his arm, Severus Apparated. He felt Hermione grab his arm even tighter as the squeezing feeling intensified.

Just at the point where the feeling was about to become intolerable it lessened again. They found themselves standing on a broad stone doorstep. The walls of a massive fortress towered over them. The walls of a massive fortress towered over them.

"Welcome home." Severus said, then he mentally kicked himself for saying it that way.

Hermione looked at him and smiled. "Home," she said contentedly.

Relaxing, Severus took her hand. "Do you want the grand tour?"

Hermione nodded and allowed him to lead her into the entry hall. It was surprisingly well decorated. The walls were paneled in a deep mahogany and portraits and tapestries broke the uniformity. Flameless lanterns hung five feet above their heads. As they wound their way into the fortress, Severus became increasingly animated. He was like a little kid as he showed her his home lab, the kitchen, the dining room, and several others.

At last he led her upstairs and down a long hall. At the end of the hall was a thick oak door. "This is your room." He said as he opened the door and held it for her. Hermione gasped when she saw it. The walls were mahogany paneled and there were gold accents. A fire crackled in a massive fireplace and a heatless chandelier provided supplemental light. There was a dresser with a mirror and a free standing wardrobe. But what really caught her eye was the massive four-poster bed. The drapes and comforter were a beautiful gold with copper embroidery.

"Severus, it's beautiful!"

"Then it's yours. Why don't you leave your truck here?" He suggested.

Hermione set her dice sized trunk at the foot of the bed and waved her wand over it. It quickly swelled back to its normal size. When her wand work was complete, Severus took her hand. "Come here. I want to show you the best room in the house." He led her back down the hall and down the stairs. At the bottom he turned to lead her deeper into the house. After a fairly long walk they came to a pair of towering double doors.

"Close your eyes." Severus commanded.

Hermione did as she was told.

Severus pushed the door open and guided her inside. At his command Hermione opened her eyes and could have screamed. She found herself facing the most amazing library she'd ever seen. All four walls of the colossal room were books from floor to ceiling. Old fashioned sliding ladders were stationed at regular intervals to allow better access to the upper shelves. In the center of the room were row upon row of free standing book shelves. On the far wall there was a break in the endless books for a fireplace. Over the mantle was a great silver clock framed in serpents. In front of the fireplace were two deep squishy-looking, green velvet armchairs, and a matching sofa.

As Hermione stood gaping at the sight before her Severus moved to stand behind her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and whispered in her ear, "What do you think of my humble home?" He set his head on her shoulder gently.

"It's incredible." She breathed. "You must have more books than Hogwarts even."

"Oh, yes, by a good couple of hundred I should think." Severus said proudly.

Hermione just breathed a sigh of amazement and continued to gaze around.

"What are you thinking?" Severus asked after a moment.

"I'm wondering where I should start." She explained.

Severus laughed. His warm chuckle vibrated pleasantly against her shoulder. "You are welcome to read as many as you like. I'd love it. They need to be read. I'm not here often, so they don't get the work out they need." He joked.

Hermione was about to respond when a loud CRACK echoed through the room. She jumped and whirled around. Severus did much the same. Standing behind them was a short, knobby house elf.

"Master, you're home!!" The elf exclaimed jumping up and down.

Severus smiled. "Yes, Licha. I've been here for the past hour."

"My apologies, sir. Licha was just out gathering winter vegetables from the garden." As she said this, the elf noticed Hermione standing behind Severus. "And you've brought home a young woman!" she squeaked.

"Yes. Licha this is Hermione. She's going to be staying here for a few weeks."

Licha turned to Hermione, a glazed look on her face. "An honor, Miss. You must forgive Licha. Licha is only happy. Master has been far too lonely these years. Just Licha for company. It is an honor. Anything you need…anything at all…just ask."

"Oh, that won't be nece—" Hermione began.

Licha cut her off. "Even the smallest of things, Miss."

Hermione sighed in resignation. "Alright. Thank you."

Licha beamed. Hermione was reminded of Dobby's fatal attraction to Harry and began to worry.

"Licha, it's 11:30. I'm going to show Hermione the grounds. Have lunch for us at 12:30 please."

Licha nodded. "Pleasure to meet you Miss." She said again, then she Disapparated with a loud crack.

When she'd gone Severus wound his arms around Hermione. "She likes you." He whispered.

"You two get on well." Hermione commented.

"We should. She was my mother's house elf before I inherited her. She used to babysit me when my parents were out."

"Aww…I bet she could tell loads of stories about you in diapers and you being a naughty boy." Hermione said devilishly.

"I'll swear her to secrecy." Severus threatened lightly. "Come on. Licha likes you, but you haven't gotten the dogs' stamp of approval yet."

"Dogs?" Hermione asked curiously.

Severus nodded and tugged her hand. "Come on."

Most of the immediate backyard was a massive grassy lawn. On the edge of this was a forest that stretched for several miles to the base of the range of even higher mountains that framed the bowl that the fortress sat in. Severus whistled and was answered by two resounding barks. To massive Doberman pinschers came barreling around the corner, barking and jumping. When they looked in danger of running into them, Severus raised a hand. Both dogs stopped dead and sat.

"Hermione, I'd like you to introduce you to my boys. That one is Salazar and the other one is Vader." At Hermione's odd look he shrugged. "It's from a Muggle film."

"I know what its from, I just didn't expect you to have seen it." Hermione said.

"My father was a Muggle. I take quite an interest in their cinema and music." Severus said, as though he was divulging a deep secret. He turned back to the dogs. "Boys, come meet Hermione!" Both dogs stood up and walked calmly over to them.

"Uh, which one is which again?"

Severus chuckled. "Salazar has the green collar and Vader's is black."

"Right. Got it." Hermione said, kneeling to face the dogs. "Hi, boys." She said gently. Salazar came up first and licked her face. Hermione stood up quickly. "I hope that was the stamp of approval that you meant." She moaned, wiping the spit from her face.

"Yes, that's what I meant." Severus said, pulling her into his arms and kissing her. "If the dogs like you then I have an excuse for my behavior."

"Is that what you think?" Hermione chastised him playfully.

"Mhmm." Severus murmured.

"You really think that you need an excuse?"

"Don't I?"

"Not in my book."

"Prove it." Severus challenged.

Hermione kissed him and then relaxed in his arms. She rested her head on his chest and wound her arms around his thin, but muscular chest. Severus held her and laid his head on top of hers. He sighed. Contentment flooded him.

Suddenly one of the dogs, probably Salazar, felt left out and jumped up on them. Over balanced by the extra weight, Severus and Hermione toppled. They burst out laughing as both dogs swarmed over them, vying for attention. Severus secretly found himself wishing for more moments like this.


	8. A Shadow and A Threat

**Redefining Nothing**

Ch 8: A Shadow and A Threat

**A/N: So sorry once again about the delay in updating...I seem to be getting worse. I've had this chapter written forever I just haven't gotten around to typing it up. Thank you to all who reviewed the last chapter and to Jordyn C. and Zara J. for your continuing beta work and support. You two are the best and I wouldn't be on Ch. 8 without you.**

Several evenings before Christmas found Severus and Hermione laying together on one of the sofas in his library. Severus was deeply absorbed in a theory of advanced potion making. Hermione, leaning against his chest, was half-way reading a book of defensive charms. Mostly she was thinking about her relationship with Severus. As she looked back at their time together something missing from the memories stuck out at her. "Sev? Can I ask you something?"

"Mhmm.." He said looking up from his book.

"Do you have feelings for me?"

"What are you talking about? You know I do. Why else would we be here?" Severus was astounded. "Where is this coming from?" He set his book aside and looked sternly down at her.

"I don't know. I was just thinking about our time together." Hermione took a deep breath. "I couldn't think of a single time you've said 'I love you'."

Severus sighed. _You have to tell her sometime! _His conscience screamed at him. He sighed again. "I can't." He said.

"Severus, it's simple. If you mean it you say the three little words."

"I can't." Severus protested. "I stop believing in those words a long time ago."

"Why?" Hermione persisted.

"It's difficult to explain. I don't know how to. It's complicated." Severus stammered, uncomfortable.



"Try." Hermione implored him. Sick fear was rising rapidly in her chest. Maybe there was another woman he was pining for and she was a vain attempt to make the other jealous or to forget her. "Please." She tried to keep the begging out of her voice.

"'Mione, you don't understand. You wouldn't understand." Severus swallowed hard. "I just don't believe that those words mean anything anymore."

Hermione cuddled to him, pressing herself as close as possible. There was a sort of angry urgency that permeated her embrace. She took his hand and placed it over her heart. "I love you Severus." She kissed him lightly. "I hope that you can feel that." She kissed him a little deeper to prove her point. "But I have to know that you feel the same."

"I need you, Hermione." Severus said, desperately. God, he loved the feel of her heart beat under his fingers. He just couldn't make himself tell her what she needed to hear.

She pulled away from him. She crouched at the end of the sofa and looked at him with watery eyes. "Need is a basic emotion, Severus. The most primitive animals feel 'need'. The _need_ to eat, the _need_ for water, the _need_ to procreate… Needing something implies reason, having to have something whether you like it or not. Diabetics don't like insulin but they need it. Remus doesn't like Wolfsbane, but he needs it." Tears ran down her cheeks freely now. "Love is senseless, but it is much, much deeper. Look at me!! I'm in love with a man that says he can't love me! Why ever would I put myself in that position voluntarily?!"

Her tears were too much for Severus. He got angry as a defense for his tumultuous emotions. "Well, maybe you never should have let it go this far!" He snarled.

"Me!" Hermione exclaimed through her tears. "You started this. Maybe if you hadn't tricked me, I wouldn't have fallen for you. But however it happened, I'm here now. I've taken the risk of telling you how I feel and all you can give me is 'need'." A fresh wave of tears momentarily choked her. "Just like an animal!" She cried, when she could speak again.

"An animal?!" He yelled.



Hermione got to her feet. "Yes, Severus. An animal." She turned on her heel and left, before he could see that her heart was broken.

After the library doors banged shut, Severus collapsed with his head in his hands. He'd never meant to fall in love again. He'd thought that maybe if he didn't say the words it would mean he wouldn't feel it. Only now, after she'd stormed out, did he realize how wrong he'd been. Only now, after he'd yelled at her, did he feel his fragile heart break again. She would probably loathe him as thoroughly as Potter did now. And he would go back to having nothing.

Hermione threw herself on her bed and sobbed. She felt hollow and empty. Everything that had sustained her of late had been torn from her. In her minds eyes she saw the anger ripple across his face again. It had scared her to see him so upset with her. Behind his eyes she thought that she'd seen a kind of desperate anguish. But when she'd looked back it had gone. She had reveled in the feel of his hand over her heart. Feeling miserable, she got up and decided to go take a hot bath to calm herself.

It took Severus about ten minutes to come back to himself and all of thirty seconds after that to decide to tell the truth. "Licha!" He called.

With a pop the elf appeared. "Yes, master?"

"Where's Hermione?"  
"I just ran her a bath in the main guest bathroom, sir."

"Thank you." Severus said as he bolted from the library.

Hermione slipped into the deep silver bathtub and sighed. The hot water relaxed her tense muscles. She closed her stinging eyes. As she was relaxing her mind wandered and she allowed pointless musings to fill her thoughts.

A few seconds after she relaxed, a colossal bang reverberated through the room. Her eyes shot open and her head whipped towards the door. To her surprise she found 

it open and Severus standing in the doorway. "What the bloody hell are you doing?!" she exclaimed, sinking lower blew the side of the tub.

He just strode towards her with a smoldering look in his dark eyes. The closer he came the farther into the tub she sank. Eventually she reached out of the tub and grabbed her wand. She gave it a swish and the water turned opaque silver, like mercury. Satisfied that he couldn't see anything she didn't want him to, she turned back to him. "What are you doing?" She demanded again. He was still looking at her with that burning fire, though he was much closer now. He opened his mouth as though about to say something, when suddenly he crumpled off to the right, as though an invisible fist had punched him in the side. He grabbed at his right forearm. "Severus!" She called out, feeling helpless, but unwilling to raise more than another inch from the water.

Severus' left hand quivered as he reached for his right sleeve. He shakily pulled it back to the elbow. On the underside of his bare forearm the Dark Mark twisted and writhed in charcoal black. Through the haze of pain brought on by the Dark Lord's call, he vaguely heard Hermione gasp in shock. "I need to talk to you, 'Mione." He panted. " I need you to know that I was wrong." His muscles clenched again as the Mark burned.

"Wrong about what?!" Hermione asked, but it was lost in his groaning as the Mark burned a third time. He was late now and she knew what Voldemort did to those who were tardy. Whether or not she was angry with him she didn't want that. She couldn't. "Severus go!" She yelled at him.

"I can't! I have to talk to you!" He cried out.

"Go, goddamn it! He'll kill you!"

"I don't care!" Severus countered.

"Well, I do!" Hermione said, practically begging. " Please! For me. Because you lo—need me."

Severus looked up at her with a new fervor in his eyes. "Alright. I'll do it for you, but not because I need you. I'll go because…" He swallowed. "Because I love you, Hermione." He reached down and touched the Mark. He shuddered and then disappeared.



Hermione sank back up to her neck in the mercury colored water. She felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

Late that night, Hermione was stretched out on one of the library couches. She was just beginning to doze off when she heard the massive front door bang open and then closed. She bolted upright out of her drowsy state. She stood up and ran out into the hallway. There on the far end of the hall stood Severus. He was stooped over and was leaning against the wall with one hand.

"Severus!" She cried out, running to him. Just as she reached him, he collapsed. She supported him against her. With the help of a simple levitating spell she managed to carry him to her room. She laid him out on her bed and called Licha. She instructed the house elf to get her a bowl of cold water and a cloth. When she had it she began to mop his forehead with a cool damp cloth. He was panting and feverish, but at the same time shivers wracked his tall thing frame. She knew that he needed to be kept warm, but she didn't want to leave him. At last she set aside the cool cloth and went to the closet for extra blankets. When she'd laid them over him she picked up her wand and attempted a couple of healing spells. Her arm shuddered as the spells ricocheted back up her arm.

"Fine," she muttered to herself. "Good, old Muggle healing it is."

She folded the cool rag on his brow to keep the fever down and then she slipped under the blankets with him. She tucked the edges in around them and laid her head on his shoulder. She wrapped her arms around him and pressed close. She lay there with him and allowed her eyes to close. With her eyes closed she could feel when his breathing slowed and steadied around two a.m.

Not long afterwards, he turned on his side to face her. "Are you awake?" he whispered.

"I'm glad you're awake." Hermione responded. "What happened?"

"I was late, remember?" Severus said wryly. "I'm not sure exactly, but I'd imagine it was some sort of toxin. That's his style."

"I'm so sorry, Severus." Hermione whispered. "If I hadn't been so awful this wouldn't have happened. I never should have been so horrible and insistent."



Severus placed his finger on her lips. "You had every right to insist my love. I should never have denied you the knowledge of my feelings. In truth, I was trying to deny myself to protect my heart from pain. If I thought it would end up hurting you I never would have done it. I just didn't want to lose you. I was afraid of getting hurt again. I was so, so wrong. And I'm sorry." He pulled her closer and took in a deep breath of her scent. "God, I'm so, so sorry. I love you, Hermione."

Hermione hadn't really let herself believe that he'd actually said it before. But now with his arms around her and his voice right in her ear, she couldn't deny the reality of it. Tears of pure, blissful joy poured down her cheeks as she pressed her face into the dark cloth covering his shoulder. "I hoped you did…I didn't want to believe it wasn't true. Before you left I thought you'd said it, but I couldn't make myself put any faith in it. I fell in love with you … well I guess it was that Saturday when I assisted you in your lab. You were so kind and normal. Then you held me and kissed me for the first time…" She involuntarily shivered with pleasure at the thought. She turned her head and kissed him right at the collar of his shirt.

In the tense, charged moment that followed, it was Severus' turn to shudder. He leaned his head back and exposed his neck to her. To his intense satisfaction she continued to press light kisses on the exposed skin of his neck. Then she moved over his jaw line and captured his mouth. Playfully she bit his lower lip. Growling, he flipped her onto her back and pinned her there. She giggled. He cut off her laughter by reclaiming her mouth. His kiss was harsh and punishing at first, and she struggled under him. But slowly it morphed into something entirely new. He poured all of his deep-seated love for her into his kiss. His heart swelled painfully as he felt her return the kiss with equal feeling.

At last they parted, panting heavily. Severus rolled onto his back pulling Hermione with him, so that she was sprawled half on his chest. Their heaving chests pressed together as they fought to bring their pulses back to normal.

Cradled in his arms, Hermione drifted off to sleep. Severus lay awake, relishing the feel of her chest rising and falling against his. _How did I get this lucky twice? _ He asked himself. But he had to admit that Hermione felt better than Lily ever had. They felt better together, more right. As he breathed in her scent he promised himself that Potter wouldn't come between them the way his father had come between him and Lily. Still holding her, he drifted off to sleep.

When the sunlight first broke through the cracks around the window shutters, Hermione awoke disoriented. At first her still foggy mind couldn't place the solid something next to her back and the heavy weight across her waist. As she lay there trying to gain her bearings, the weight across her waist tightened, drawing her back against the solid object. Reality came crashing back in of her as her hair was brushed aside and the back of her neck was peppered with kisses. "Severus…" she moaned as Goosebumps ran down her skin.

"Good morning, my love." He whispered in her ear. "How did you sleep?"

"Like I was in heaven." She murmured, twisting in his arms to face him. She kissed his nose, and reached up to stroke his hair. Then she buried her head in his strong shoulder. His clean, manly scent made her heart trill and her head spin. She pressed herself closer to him and ran her hands down his muscled back. "I love you. I love this feeling…" she whispered.

"Mmhm…" Severus rumbled. "You're a drug, Hermione. And I'm addicted. I couldn't refuse you even if I wanted to and heaven knows I don't." He dipped his head to kiss her neck and face. When he'd finished his lavish attentions, a small patch of skin at the back of her neck remained red and tender. He delicately kissed the small bruise.

Hermione's skin was singing from his kisses. She dug her fingers into his back as he pulled away from her. "No…" She begged breathily. "Don't stop, Sev. Finish this."

Severus looked into her over bright, wildly passionate eyes and very nearly gave in. Instead he shook his head. "No, sweetheart," he said kindly, but firmly. "We both know where that would lad and neither of us are ready for it."

"I'm ready, Sev. I promise you. Please!"

"No, 'Mione. I'm not. This is too new. What if it doesn't work out? I couldn't take it." She opened her mouth but he laid his finger across it. "And maybe in this moment you think you could, but later you'll realize that it did matter."

Hermione growled and rolled away from him, but she stopped begging. Severus sighed and, propped up on one elbow, began to stroke her hair.

"I'm sorry love." He whispered.



Hermione rolled to face him. Frustrated tears streamed down her face. "Why does this have to be so hard?" she asked. "You're right. I know you are, but I'm so in love with you that it hurts. It's a physical burning in me. Part of me treasures it, but part knows that you're my professor and this is wrong."

"I know sweetheart. I know. It's hard, so hard. But we'll manage. We have each other's love."

Hermione groaned again in unhappiness.


End file.
